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| WWE Capitol Punishment |
-Randy Orton is out and looking like he is ready for action as Josh Mathews welcomes everyone to Friday Night Smackdown. At the announce table it looks like Booker T is the only one willing to wear a tie on TV as they debate how dangerous Christian is.
-Orton poses for the crowd a few times and gets a nice ovation when he does so. He starts off by saying that it’s true that he was diagnosed with a concussion. That being said, he doesn’t care; he wants to fight tonight! He said that Christian got what he wanted in a World Title match, so now he wants what he wants and that is the chance to beat the hell out of Christian tonight.
-Teddy Long’s music cuts him off and Teddy comes to the ring to tell Orton that he is not medically cleared to wrestle and he will not let him perform tonight…I mean fight tonight.
-Christian joins Smackdown but opts to stay on the ramp. He takes credit for the concussion and he tells Orton that he should thank him because now he has an excuse as to why he lost the title to Christian. He goes on to mock Long again by polling the audience as to if they will think any less of Orton after he loses the World Title this Sunday. They boo. He then says that if Orton is really nice, maybe - just maybe, he will give him a re-match five days after Capitol Punishment.
-Sheamus comes out and says that Christian is whining, Orton is hurt, and Long is incompetent. He says that he beat Orton last week and he should move ahead of Christian, who has lost 50 title shots in a row. Christian cuts him off by saying that his match is set. Teddy makes a match for tonight: Christian vs. Sheamus, if Sheamus wins the match on Sunday becomes a triple threat; if Christian wins the match stays the same. Long then offers Orton a seat at ringside to watch the action, but if he gets involved there will be serious consequences. Orton agrees with him by saying that there will be serious consequences tonight.
-At the announce table, Cole thinks that it is unfair for Sheamus to be thrown into the mix, he should wait his turn and this isn’t fair to Christian.
-Still to come: Daniel Bryan, Sin Cara, and Ezekiel Jackson vs. Wade Barrett, Cody Rhodes, and Ted DiBiase
(Commercial)
[Q2]
-Plug for WWE.com’s top 25 managers of all time list. In all honesty, as long as The Brain is #1, it is pretty hard to mess that list up.
1 -- DANIEL BRYAN & SIN CARA & EZEKIEL JACKSON vs. WADE BARRETT & CODY RHODES & TED DIBIASE
Cole’s suggestion for the face’s team name: Two Nerds and a Big Guy. Oh, Cole, you clever little…Ted and Zeke start things off and Jackson shoulder blocks DiBiase down and splashes him in the corner. Tag into Sin Cara who head scissors DiBiase out of the ring as Smackdown takes a break less than a minute into the action!
(Commercial)
DiBiase and Rhodes double-team Sin Cara when Smackdown returns. Rhodes tries a chicken wing bodyslam but Sin Cara reverses it into a snap mare. Springboard arm drag looks pretty but the momentum doesn’t last long as Rhodes connects with a shining wizard.
Tag to Wade Barrett, who suplexes Sin Cara and tags into DiBiase who clotheslines Cara down then makes a quick tag back to Wade. Bow and arrow submission by Barrett and Cara fights his way out of it and after a awkward exchange on non moves, Sin Cara gets a DDT out of no where and makes a hot tag to Daniel Bryan.
Bryan is a house of fire as he nails DiBiase with a big clothesline and a dropkick in the corner. Bryan goes for the pin and he gets the win?! That looked funny and not funny like a clown here to amuse you.
WINNERS: Daniel Bryan, Sin Cara, and Ezekiel Jackson in about 10:00. Conspicuous by its absence was the Sin Cara mood lighting. I guess this means WWE got my faxes, phone calls, and emails asking to stop doing that. That said, I liked where this match was going before the awkward ending.
-Striker is backstage with Sheamus and he asks the softball question about how he feels about the opportunity to be in the World Title Match this Sunday. Sheamus calls him out on his non-question and then goes on to say that he is a winner and the top superstar on Smackdown and he will be the champion after Sunday!
[Q3]
(Commercial)
-The awkward ending is re-shown and it is said that this was the ref’s fault for looking into Ted DiBiase's baby blues instead of looking at the shoulders.
2 -- JINDER MAHAL (w/Great Khali) vs. VLADMIR KOZLOV
New generic music for Jinder this week. Good for him. Headlock takedown by Kozlov to start, but Mahal powers out and takes control with a shoulder block to the stomach in the corner. Booker T says that Jinder has tons of “ducky” and maybe that is why he is able to have control over Khali. Flying knee by Mahal leads into a Russian Legsweep that gets a near fall. Vladimir puts up a fight with some shots to the midsection and a few headbutts. Mahal retakes the advantage by sending Vladimir into the steel ringpost shoulder first. Khali judo chops Kozlov while the ref’s back is turned and Jinder uses his Half Nelson Slam to pick up the win.
WINNER: Jinder Mahal in 2:30 by pinfall. Jinder getting all these squash matches is telling me that he is being built up for Orton probably in the fall. I don’t know how I feel about that, I guess I need to see more from his matches before I decide.
-Tonight – Christian vs. Sheamus, with a bunch of stipulations!
(Commercial)
-The "Did You Know" this week is too ridiculous to comment on.
[Q4]
-Josh Mathews is in the ring and he introduces Big Show. Big Show comes out with a big yellow glove on his right hand. Is this homage to Michael Jackson? Josh asks why Show is here since he is a Raw Superstar, Big Show coldly responds that he heard Alberto Del Rio will be on Smackdown tonight. Josh then throws to the highlight reel summing up the feud between Big Show and Del Rio up to this point.
-Back in the arena, Josh asks Show how he feels and Show says, “I feel fine.” He must have learned that promo during promo camp when he was a kid. All the other kids went to baseball camp or drama camp, Big Show went to promo camp and spent six straight summers there and all he took out of it was “I feel fine.”
-Teddy Long comes out and says that if Del Rio shows up tonight, Big Show will not lay a hand on him because criminal charges have been brought up against Show for his beat down of Ricardo Rodriguez last Monday. He said that if he lays a hand on Del Rio, then both Long and Show will lose their jobs! Teddy then makes a match for right now: Big Show vs. Mark Henry!
(Commercial)
-Mark Henry still hasn’t made it to the ring when Smackdown returns. Big Show winces in pain as Henry gets in the ring. I wince in pain at my computer thinking about this match I’m about to watch! Thankfully, Big Show jumps Mark before the match begins and he beats the holy hell out of him and knocks him out with the big punch. It looks like Mark Henry is done flirting with the top of the card on Smackdown. Referees and paramedics come to the aid of Henry as Show makes his way to the back.
-Mark Henry is still out in the ring as they load him up on the world strongest stretcher.
-Backstage, Matt Striker is with Christian and he asks him how he feels about Sheamus being in his match this Sunday. Christian says he feels nostalgic for the days when Teddy Long knew how to run Smackdown. He said he is done proving himself and he shouldn’t have to prove that something he shouldn’t have lost is his.
[Q5]
3 -- ALICIA FOX & TAMINA & ROSA MENDES vs. A.J. & KAITLYN & NATALYA
Natalya actually removes her coat from this match (she didn’t bother doing so Monday on Raw for the 46-woman tag match). Fox and Kaitlyn start things off with Kaitlyn knocking Fox’s head into the turnbuckle. Alicia tags in Tamina who overpowers Kaitlyn who tags in Nattie. Headbutt by Tamina takes control, but she showboats and Natalya locks in a Sharpshooter, but it gets broken up. A.J. is in the ring with Tamina who blocks a crucifix and pins her after a Samoan Drop.
WINNERS: Alicia Fox, Tamina, and Rosa Mendes by pinfall in 2:00. Apparently an unnamed stipulation was that if A.J. won, she would take Josh Mathews to see Green Lantern. I wouldn’t say that Mathews lost out on anything there. Another awful Divas match. These Divas, outside of Natalya, have no heat and shouldn’t be wrestling in front of people, let alone on Smackdown. I’ll say it again, shut down the division until they know what they are doing with it!
(Commercial)
-Johnny Curtis is backstage on a putting green. There is an ace in the hole. Mike’s Reax:
-Booker T is still having dreams about Obama. Obama answers questions from Christian, Cody Rhodes, Sheamus (welcome to Cleveland, fella), and, to a lesser extent, The Great Khali and Hornswoggle. I thought Hornswoggle could talk after WrestleMania…
-The announcers run down the Capitol Punishment card.
(Commercial)
[Q6] The Usos are in the ring and Heath Slater and Justin Gabriel have brand-new generic rock music! Highlights from The Corre’s breakup are shown. I use the term highlight loosely.
4 -- THE USOS vs. HEATH SLATER & JUSTIN GABRIEL
Jimmy and Heath start as Josh says that this match might decide who will be the number one contenders for the Tag Team Titles. Jimmy pounds away at Slater in the corner, but Slater ducks underneath him and trips him up on the ropes. A few kicks to the face and Heath tags in Justin who gets a few shots in then tags Slater back in. Sleeper hold at about a minute in and Slater pulls Jimmy’s hair to prevent a tag. Heath goes up top for a high-risk move but he gets caught in mid air and power slammed! Impressive-looking move, there.
Jey gets tagged in and he is fired up as he gives Gabriel a running knee to the temple in the corner. Jey tags Jimmy who tosses Gabriel straight into the air and Jey Samoan Drops him! Heath makes the save and gets tossed from the ring and that lets Jey climb to the top and splashes Justin for the win!
WINNERS: The Usos by pinfall in 4:00.
-A video package hyping Cena vs. R-Truth is shown. This match has shades of John Cena vs. The Miz from the summer of ’09 where Cena squashed him, but it fired up Miz and had him work hard to work his way up the card. I have a feeling Cena will squash Truth, but it will do more for Killings than it will for Cena.
(Commercial)
[Q7] Alberto Del Rio gets in the middle of the ring and grabs a microphone. He starts off by introducing himself, but I already know who he is. He addresses rumors that he is coming back to Smackdown because he is too afraid to face The Big Show on Raw. He also says that it is his destiny to be WWE Champion someday.
-Del Rio called what happened to Big Show with his car was an accident and accidents happen to bad people. Alberto then throws to a replay of Monday’s Show where Big Show assaulted Ricardo Rodriguez. It looks like the Batman TV show from the '60s minus the “biff” and “pow” when Big Show strikes Ricardo.
-Back in the arena, Del Rio calls that not an accident and that is why he is filing criminal charges against The Big Show. Del Rio then puts over Rodriguez as loyal and a good friend and The Big Show was wrong for what he did because Ricardo has a little girl that he takes care of, but he can’t anymore because of what Show did to him. Del Rio vows to get revenge for him this Sunday.
-Big Show comes out and Cole reminds the audience that if Big Show lays a hand on Del Rio that he will be fired. Show charges the ring and Alberto bolts and runs into the audience. Del Rio taunts Big Show from the crowd and Big Show reacts by destroying the announce table and throwing Tony Chimel's chair. I guess Big Show is the New Nexus! They cut to Del Rio in the audience and he isn’t laughing anymore.
(Commercial)
-Cole, Mathews, and Booker T are sitting in the ruins of the announce table as a replay of Big Show destroying the ringside area is shown.
[Q8]
5 -- CHRISTIAN vs. SHEAMUS – If Sheamus wins, he's added to the World Title match at Capitol Punishment; if Orton interferes, bad things will happen
Christian’s new “Hit the Switch” t-shirt looks awful. I bet it becomes the only shirt to undersell Corre t-shirts. Josh Mathews everyone that Randy Orton has a concussion as he makes his way to ringside to sit in his special seat. Sheamus overpowers Christian to start and takes him down with a clothesline and a knee lift. Christian bails to the outside and comes face to face with Orton and Sheamus blindsides him as Smackdown takes a break!
(Commercial)
Sheamus is pounding on Christian's chest as Smackdown returns and Christian fires back with a shoulder to the gut. Captain Charisma chokes Sheamus on the bottom rope then walks into an Irish Curse. Christian retreats to the apron and he hangs Sheamus up on the ropes.
Christian comes off the top ropes and misses a headbutt or a big splash depending on whom you ask. It looks like Christian busted his nose open on that one. Sheamus goes to the top and comes off with a flying shoulder block that gets a two count. Sheamus is showing signs of frustration and Christian tries catching a quick pin by putting his feet on the ropes on a roll up.
Christian with a Tornado DDT from the middle turnbuckle gets a two count and now Christian is frustrated as he starts eyeballing Orton at ringside. He calls for a Spear, but Sheamus telegraphs it and catches Christian with a Polish Hammer for a two count. Sheamus counters a Kill Switch and Christian ducks a Brogue Kick and Sheamus fight outs of another Kill Switch attempt. Both men are on the top rope and Christian smashes Sheamus’ face off the steel post and crawls into the ring to get the three count!
WINNER: Christian in 9:00 by pinfall. Nice little match put together and I liked the unique finish out of nowhere. The positive I can take from Sheamus losing is that it didn’t hurt him; he was out-smarted by the veteran Christian.
-Post-match, Randy Orton tries getting his hands on Christian, who high-tails it out of the ring. The Viper settles for Sheamus who is still out cold. He waits for Sheamus to start getting up and he punts Sheamus back to FCW! Christian and Orton stare each other down as Smackdown goes off the air!
Mike’s Reax: I thought it was an above-average show that seemed to fly by. The focus, and rightly so, was Christian and Orton. I feel that they have done a great job building the match for this Sunday and I am really looking forward to it because I have no idea who is going to win. I could have done without the Raw guys showing up for a few segments, but the most was made of them, so I guess I have no real complaints about it.
